I've Been Making It Rain With the Shamps (and Conditioner).

I'm weirdly picky when it comes to shampoo and conditioner combos. I know, shocking, considering I don't give an eff about anything. So I currently have an unusual situation happening. I was sent samples of three different shampoo and conditioner deals, from three different brands, AND I LOVE ALL OF THOSE B'S. I couldn't even pick one that I was feeling the most, so eff it, I'll talk about all three, BECAUSE THIS IS MY BLOG AND I DO WHAT I WANT.

Yep, it's like that. And you know what else it's like?

This. Because if you aren't into Jackee Harry and Dolly Parton shaking their sh*t in insane space-y garb, I can't even with your ass. Now let's get to business.

Eufora Beautifying Exilirs Bodifying Shampoo & Conditioner

Smells Like -- citrus-y, fresh stuff. (I'm the worst at describing smells. Good. It smells good.)

Yeah, Science! -- These Eufora products contain the Vibrant Color Complex, which you can read about by clicking, because, science. Plus, the  entire line of nine products is "based in an ALL Plant Essence of Sage and Thyme and contains ZERO water or fillers. In addition, Beautifying Elixirs does not contain: Artificial Aromas, Colorants, Sulfates, Parabens, Gluten, Mineral Oil, Petrolatum, Propylene Glycol, Sodium Chloride, Phthalates, Formaldehyde." Okay, so it smells herb-like. But not gross herbs. I promise!

Why I Love This Ish -- My hair is really fine, so it makes my hair way more voluminous. The conditioner is really lightweight, but moisturizing, which is a major feat. This combo is seriously s'mores-levels of amazingness. It has turned a tiny part of my coal heart into a diamond.

Price -- Get these badass b's for $28.50 for the shampoo and $29.99 for the conditioner. Click here to find out more about the products and find a salon near you that sells it.

Evolution Keratin Moisturizing Shampoo & Conditioner

Smells Like -- sexy, perfume-ish fragrance. Like a Pantene/Biolage hybrid, so obviously, delish.

Yeah, Science! -- These puppies are made for hair that has had a keratin treatment, so they're gentle and moisturizing, and great for color-treated hair. They contain that good good like Argan oil and vitamin E, and don't have the bad bad like sulfates and sodium chloride.

Why I Love This Ish -- This stuff just feels sumptuous, like a spa day that takes place on a rose petal. My hair always feels soft and hydrated after using these mofos. Silky haired vixen, party of one. (Or more, if you b's are coming. BYOW.)

Price -- $25 for the pair. To purchase, click here, and click here to find out more about these babies.

Van Thomas Concepts Christine Shampoo & Reconstruct Conditioner

Smells Like -- a Sweet Tart, real talk. Dammit, I'm hungry.

Yeah, Science! -- These homies have something called The Life Complex (sounds sexy) which is made up of keratin, silk proteins, and jojoba oil, and helps replenish nutrients in your hair. It's what TLC named themselves after. (No. No, it isn't.)

Why I Love This Ish -- The combination of these two is pretty damn flawless. The shampoo is really cleansing, then that beast of a Reconstruct conditioner just makes my hair feel healthy, man. Plus, the packaging says cute ish like "This package includes: a new and improved head of hair. Note: not a new and improved you. You already rock." Cue the "AWWWWW" soundtrack!

Price -- You can get the duo for $45, or the shampoo for $18 and the conditioner for $32. Click here to chigity check it.
With all this clean and condition talk, I think I need to go get down on some of these prods. My hair is dirtier than an actual MOP mop right now.

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Walk Up to the Club Like, "What Up? I got a big Wand!" (And a Small One. And Other Sizes.)

Holy eff, you guys. I really need to talk to you about something big in my life right now. And that thing is the ISO Beauty 5 Piece Curling Iron Set, and even bigger than that, curling wands. The nice boos at ISO Beauty sent me this set to try, and I can't keep my damn dirty hands off of it.

iso beauty 5 piece curling iron set, $395

Curling wands are my new jam, and this set is the true boss b*tch. It has five barrel sizes, so you can choose your own adventure, from beachy waves to OG Nicole Kidman.

Okay, maybe not THAT extreme. That's some tight, tight spiral perm-age.

So what's the difference in a curling wand/clipless curling iron and the curling iron you've had since '97? Mainly, the type of curl you'll get. With the old school curling iron, you get more of a classic, barrel-y curl. Here's what the curling wand creates, with different sized barrels:

what happens to old weave? science experiments!

See? Then ends aren't all weirdly crunched up and really curly, like mine tend to be with the Vanilla Ice irons. (That means the old school kind.)

But my favorite thing about clipless curling irons? THIS SH*T IS EASY. No, no. Don't worry about clipping the curling iron arm thing on your hair, then winding it up...blah, blah, blah. That crap is boring. With a wand, you wrap your hair around it, hold it for a few seconds, and done. The combination of this with surf spray creates sexy ass bedhead-y hair that looks like you give zero effs and were just born super hot.

It's that good. And good for lazies like me. And where do I find this cat? And do those glasses come in human versions?

Find out more info on the ISO Beauty 5 Piece Curling Iron Set (or whatever the hell strikes your fancy) here.




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Sonofa B Face, I'm in Love With ANOTHER Hair Oil.

I know, I know. Hair oil, schmair oil -- I feel like I've talked about every kind of hair oil ad nauseum, but when I find some sh*t that I'm super into I have to tell you mofos. It's like a damn sickness. And when I was sampled this Kitoko Oil Treatment, I knew that I had to tell you b's about it, even if it made you hate me (more).

 
Here's what I love about this ish; it's not oily, even if you have thin, fine hair. For those of you with thick ass manes of hair, and can use any ol' ass oil you want, then good on you. (Shut up -- I'm trying to be Born Again British, like Madonna or Gwynnie Patlrow, THE most beautiful human that has ever lived, or something.) But for those of us that are on the thinner (hair) side of things, you usually have to be super careful about toeing that fine line between lustrous and well-moisturized locks and greasy gobs of goop. (There I go again. I've got Gwyneth on the brain.)

don't act like this isn't the best thing you've ever seen. ever.

But you don't have to worry about 99 goopy problems with Kitoko Oil. And here's the science (b*tch):

Kitoko Oil Treatment combines the healing and therapeutic properties of Karité and Argan oils to revitalize, strengthen and condition the hair. It provides intense nourishment and its lightweight formula is perfect for all hair types as it helps restore shine and moisture balance. It helps tame frizzy and uncontrollable hair, alleviates scalp dryness, improves hair’s elasticity and offers instant absorption with a non-greasy feel and no buildup. A few drops help reduce dry time and replenish brittle hair and ends. The color-safe formula contains naturally derived UV filters to help protect hair from environmental damage.

Sounds boss, right? Well how's about this one -- after Shakira's (yes, SHAKIRA) hair stylist used the Kitoko Oil on her hair, homegirl requested that the company send her some to use on her Shaki head in real life. And you know, her hair follicles don't lie. (Ugh, that was terrible.) But seriously, boo boo could afford to use ANYTHING in the world, and she chooses to use this.

 

If it's good enough for Shakira, it's most definitely good enough for my trashy ass. To find a salon that sells the good good that is Kitoko Oil Treatment in your area, look here for more info.





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GUUUUUURL of the Day: The Hot B*tch That Sings the Theme to The Neverending Story

I feel like a piece of sh*t, you guys. The Neverending Story is one of my down ass b movies. I totally love that crap, and have been searching for a headband like the damn Childlike Empress for my entire adult life. Now that I have actually written that, it seems a little odd, but I don't give an eff. That thing is amazing, and needs to be replicated on my head. So the fact that I have never seen the music video that accompanies the NES theme song is banana pancakes.

HOW HAVE I MISSED OUT ON THIS?!? I seriously thought this sh*t was a joke video that homeboy made at a state fair, where you can record fake music videos. But this is real, man. THAT HAIR EXISTED ON A REAL HUMAN'S HEAD. It's a little bit country, a little bit rock n' roll, and a lot a bit third grade boy. And if that's your singing face all the time, Imma need you to stop singing. It's frightening. And porn-y. And makes me feel uncomfortable in my brain area. I can appreciate the fact that you're giving me full-on FACE, but I can't handle it.

Nope. Not today, sir. Not today.




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I'm Getting That Hurrr Looking Right -- by Eating (Supplement) Stuff.

I love beauty supplements. But I can NEVER remember to take a damn vitamin. That crap just flits right out of my head like I'm a chihuahua with zero attention span. But eating stuff, I ALWAYS remember that. That's one of the best things about my new down ass b that I was so generously allowed to sample, Beauty Bumps.

beauty bumps, $85

YOU EAT THIS ISH. AND IT TASTES LIKE A MINT. AND IT HAS GOLD IN IT.

But that's not the REAL real deal on this stuff. Beauty Bumps are an edible supplement that helps to grow your hair up to 42% with SCIENCE. It works by:

•    Reducing DHT which is one of the primary causes of hair loss
•    Supporting the anti-aging of the hair follicle
•    Significantly improving circulation which is essential to healthy hair
•    Helping reduce the effects of stress on the body

And to get the deets on what's actually in the bumps, click here. It's still too early to tell how long and flowing my mop is going to get using the Bumps (I've been taking them less than a month), but I'm so happy that my ass will actually get a result because I'm eating these things as directed. This is possibly the first time I've done anything as directed, ever, in life.

via realitytvgifs

Watch out Rapunzel, I'm coming for yo' ass. Check out more about Beauty Bumps here.

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Rumer Willis' Everything Game is All Kinds of Wrong.

This is what Rumer Willis (who is Bruce Willis and Demi Moore's daughter, DAD) wore to some Las Vegas day club opening this weekend. But before we get into this effery, can someone tell me what in dumb's sake a DAY CLUB is? Can't it just be a club that's open during the day? Or a pool or whatnot? Quit trying to reinvent the slut wheel, Vegas.

Anyway, I don't even care about the fact that lil' boosie is wearing a bikini top and glitter eff skirt. It's Las Vegas. And a day club. I don't know the appropriate dressing etiquette. But those sandals look like they should be worn by a Pop Pop named Saul that lives in Boca Raton. And her hair isn't bad in THEORY, but for some reason it looks like it was Fashion Plate-d onto her head. It makes my eyeballs feel awkward.

Here's Rumer (Is it wrong to hope that she opens a strip club named after herself?) with a friend, that is bringing up some questions for me. What is that faux camera thing around homeboy's neck? If that silly nonsense is an iPhone case, I will LOSE. MY. SH*T. I'm getting too old for this mess, you guys.

pics via buzzfeed




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Random Homie: KeratinPerfect 3-in-1 Multi-Action Hair Beauty Balm

My hair is thin, y'allz. Like Olive Oil thin. (As in Popeye's boo thang, not the food product.) So if I ever find a hair product that I feel like makes my hair feel thicker and more luxurious, I hold onto that ish.

keratinperfect hair bb, $28

I've been using the KeratinPerfect Hair BB for the past couple of weeks, and I actually feel like my hair is thicker and healthier. Am I an insane person? (Don't have a smart mouth.) I do know one thing FOR CERTAIN -- this mess does pretty much everything but take your ass out to dinner. Here's the deal (from the website):

REPAIRS: Progressive Repair Technology helps stop breakage.
PROTECTS: Forms a humidity barrier for all-day frizz protection.
PERFECTS: Argan, almond and apricot kernel oils enhance moisture creating soft, lustrous texture in all hair types and revealing shinier, healthier-looking strands.  Revolutionary Apple Stem Cell extract rejuvenates the hair and makes it noticeably healthier with every use. KeratinPerfect 3-in-1 HAIR BB is free of parabens, sulfates and sodium chloride and is safe for color-treated hair.

I've been using only this (as far as product goes) the entire time I've sampled this product, and I really don't feel like I need anything else. It doesn't weigh my hair down, and it's smooth and ish. And while $28 isn't Dollar Store pricing, I usually use like four products at a time, so it's not INSANE. This b is my current homie fo' sho' right now. Totally into it. Check out the deets for yourself here. Now I have to go because my ass is hown-gray. I'm trying to give up dairy, and that mess is hard.

via thestupidfaces

I kind of hope that aliens abduct me instead. If you eat cheese in outer space, that crap doesn't count.

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GUUUUUURL of the Day: Bradley Cooper Sporting What I Can Only Hope is a Precursor to a Tight, TIGHT Ass Perm

via huffpo

Brad Coo is making some crazy ass movie where he apparently works at a slutty Army Surplus store that does illegal perms on the side. Or not -- I don't know what the hell this is all about, but if tight spiral perms are involved, sign my ass up. I've been looking for a hot as eff hairstyle from a movie, because I haven't really felt one since that dick Darryl Soul Glo-ed it up in Coming to America.

I know, I know. Dude straight up ripped off Lionel Richie's "Hello" hair, but it was a hot look. So whatever the eff Bradley's movie is about, that hair better be looking right. If not, he has to do this, like, ALL THE TIME.



Don't even play like you aren't into this right now. Stop it.


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Macadamia Nuts Aren't Just for Delicious Cookies.

I've never really thought about macadamia anything, except for how friggin' delicious the nuts are in a white chocolate chunk cookie. Ish is the good good. That was until I received a sampling of the hair care products from Macadamia Natural Oil. The products combine macadamia oil (duh) and argan oil to (via their website):

"Together, macadamia oil and argan oil replenish the hair’s natural emollients with the high content of essential fatty acids found naturally in both of these exceptional oils. The combined benefits help to nourish and protect the hair from harmful UV rays while repairing hair follicles for improved elasticity and shine."

Sounds great, right? Let's delve into this madness.

macadamia natural oil deep repair masque, $4-$55

One of my favorite products from the line is the Deep Repair Masque. It smells like a pina colada-fueled dream (all of the products do), and people are always telling me how good I smell when I use it. I guess I usually smell bad, but that's neither here nor there. And more importantly, my hair feels like a damn silk factory after using it. I can't even rave about this stuff enough. IT'S AMAZING. I feel all-caps-strongly about it, so you know that ish is on the real.

macadamia natural oil flawless, $33

But the magical hair carpet ride doesn't end there. I also fell in love with a stripper Flawless, which is a 6-in-1 cleansing conditioner. Six in one?!? I can just barely count that high. Let's learn more, shall we?

"Reinvent the art of shampooing with Flawless, an innovative 6-in-1 cleansing conditioner that cleanses, conditions, reduces blow-drying time, detangles, enhances volume and eliminates frizz in one product. Flawless recreates the perfect salon blow-dry at home. 

Flawless’ innovative formula dispenses as a lightweight, no-suds mousse that gently and thoroughly cleanses without stripping hair or weighing it down. At the same time, it conditions and infuses hair with nourishing macadamia oil, chamomile, vitamin E, proteins and other nutrients. Hair is left revitalized with healthy shine, bounce and manageability."

This stuff is perfect for me, because I'm ridiculously oily, and my ass has to wash my hair errrday if I don't want to look hobo-rific. So if I don't want to over-wash my mop, I can use this cleansing conditioner instead. And here's a insanely ingenious thing about Flawless -- it has a dispenser very much like a bottle of mousse, so you aren't shivering in the shower for 30 minutes trying to get the product out. So freaking smart. Plus, it is the best cleansing conditioner I have ever used, by ten trillion miles. The first time I used it, one of my friends was all, "I don't know what the hell you did to your hair today, but it looks fantastic."

Yep, that good. Learn more about the Macadamia Natural Oil line of hair products here. Pin It

Drugstore Mofo's That Totally Live Up to The Hype

Listen. Nobody feels like spending an eff load of money on crap, when you can get great stuff on the cheap. The problem is, a lot of times with beauty sh*t you really do get what you pay for. But there are couple of really badass products that you can pick up at your favorite low-end retailer (Sorry Target, CVS, wherever the hell.) that work just as well -- if not better -- than that fancy pants mess.

l'oréal elnett extra stronghold hairspray (target, $12.99)

Wait -- why in gorgeous b hair hell did I wait until just now to try L'Oreal Elnett hairspray? And the sad part is, I got this in my Allure Best of Beauty swag, and it's been sitting in my apartment for, like, ever. What a complete douche I am. I've been using a higher-end hairspray for quite a while, and it really worked just fine. But I was digging through all of my sh*t the other day and came across this baby, and decided to see what all of the damn fuss was about. And there is a lot of fuss. This stuff is known as the cheap(er) industry favorite, and hairstylists love it, sometimes on the DL. (That's down low to you youngsters.) So I tried it, and son of a sh*t, it's really awesome. It's the finest-misting hairspray that I've ever used. I was originally a little put off by the whole "extra stronghold" mess, but this stuff is NOT Aquanet. It holds your styling, but is 100% brushable. I AM IN LOVE. GET IT.

l'oreal voluminous mascara (target, $5.84)

Okay, so I didn't realize until just this second that both of my picks come from L'Oreal. I didn't plan that ish. Truth. And I know that I've talked about L'Oreal Voluminous Mascara before, but it should be talked about often -- sh*t's the sh*t. Don't get me wrong, I love the expensive mascara as much as the next shallow gal, but this druggie(store) goodie is pretty much my favorite (or at least top two-ish), regardless of price. This is some ride-or-die b type lash stuff, right here. We're talking full, creamy (bleh), really volumizing mascara. Yaaaaas. Why get all expensive and fancy when that crap's not necessary? Not on my watch, people. Not on my watch.

Pinch 'dem pennies, baby.



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More Random Argan Homies: Amir Leave-In Hair Treatment & Amir Touch of Tan Moisturizer

I know, I know. I can't stop talking about friggin' Argan Oil products. What can I say? I'm a big ol' bag of a-holes. But you guys, Argan is the good good. And I keep finding bomb-ass (shout out to '01) products that feature it. IT'S NOT MY FAULT, MAN.

First up is Amir Argan Oil Leave-In Hair Treatment. What I really love about this stuff is that it's lightweight. It's thinner than others I've used, so you can totally use it with a million other styling products without issue. And heeelllooo there pump, so glad you're here. The pump makes it a bajillion times easier to dispense than a lame-ass pour yourself deal, and you don't have to worry about taking too much oily goodness with each use. I mean, what am I, a damn peasant? PUMPS FOR ALL! Scizzzore to the peeps that decided on that little feature.

Now to my favorite Amir homie, the Agran Oil Touch of Tan Moisturizer. Let me tell you 'bout my best friend, here. It contains not only Argan Oil (duh) and Acai Berry, but a little bit of self tanner to give your skin a nice glow. I LOVE THIS ISH. It's not TOO tan-y, and it smells like a mother effing dream. A dream, I tell you. There is not a hint of that gross ass self tanner bleeeeh smell. It's lovely.

And here's a cool little tidbit. You can go to Amir's Facebook page and get a damn FREE sample of their Argan Oil Moisturizer. Yeaaaas, b. Yes. These are salon-sold professional products, so prices will vary according to where you buy them. If you want to find your closest retailer, you can call 1.800.386.2826 for the deets. (Or, if you want to be a hooligan, you can probs pick them up on Amazon. Rule-breaking badass.)



But you'll NEVER be on Latarian's level, so you better just quit while you're ahead.




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Hair Homies: Serge Normant Meta Silk Shampoo & Meta Velour Conditioner

serge normant meta silk shampoo & meta velour conditioner, $24 each

Soooo, here's the realio dealio happening in my (hair) life. Remember when I did that whole red thing? Well, I got over that sh*t, like I do, and I had to get rid of it. So when I went to my amazing ass hair stylist, she had to strip my hair, and then promptly made me swear on that book of hair color Barbie hair samples that I would never use boxed hair dye again. Needless to say, I kind of effed up my hurrs. So when the peeps at Serge Normant sent me over some sample-age of the Meta Silk Shampoo and Meta Velour Conditioner to try, it was perfect timing. I had to get my haircare game SERIOUSLY on point, or I would be on the express bus to bald lady town.

Luckily for me, this stuff is the sauce. The first time I used this combo, my hair felt super silky and moisturized, but not greasy or heavy. Which is big for me, because as a fine-haired lady, that ish happens A LOT. These products are straight up luxurious -- thick and creamy (no comment) and make you feel like you should be wearing some fancy ass diamond cocktail ring while using them. And you shouldn't expect any less. The brain behind the line is hairdresser to stars like Julia Roberts, SJP, and Blake Lively. This ish makes me feel like I have a trust fund.

Get fancy on yo' own ass, and shop for yourself here.





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Hair Had a Turrible, Turrible Night Last Night

So the SAG Awards happened last night, and although I never watch awards shows, because that sh*t is super boring, I do like to look at red carpet pictures. And judge them. Duh, have we met? And while I perused the photos over on Buzzfeed, I noticed a very tragic theme. People were werking some horrendous hair, overall.

WTF, Baldwin? I turn to your ass to be the hot old dude. WHAT IS THIS?

Frieda Pinto is a beautiful mofo, and she looks like she's chaperoning a school dance.

Put down the flat iron, Timmy. This is completely gross, and makes you look old.

No, Megan Draper. Zooby Zooby...No.

I LOVE YOU, Jon Hamm, but you look like someone photoshopped your face into this picture. It's weirding me out, man.

And I don't even know what in hair helmet hell I'm looking at here.

 I mean, amiright???

via realitytvgifs

UPDATE IN THIS B:

There seems to be some dissension in the ranks, m'ladies and gents. (I just finished watching Downton. Get off me.) I just received this text from my friend, who CLEARLY disagrees with my JT reading.

This isn't a friggin' totalitarian state, you guys. (Bringing it back to middle school history ish.) Am I way off on any of these? Free yo' mind...and the rest will follow.


all pics via buzzfeed Pin It

Random Homie: Bango by Pro Beauty Tools

I'm not a home-bang-cutting virgin, you guys. Part of loving DIY beauty is deciding to cut some badass blunt bangs on a whim, and then promptly doing that sh*t before thinking of the consequences. Many a time have I ended up with some whack ass craziness happening on my head area. But a little while ago, I was alerted to this new little handy kit called Bango, which helps you cuts your own bangs at home. I got to try one, and here's what it comes with:

Like, literally, everything you would need to take care of the job. There's even an instructional DVD that shows you how to trimmy trim everything from blunt bangs to split ends. But the real star of the show is that little pink clip/comb deal. You just clip it on whatever area you want to trim, slide that ish to the end, and trim to the guide with the scissors provided. Mess is so easy that it isn't even funny, you guys. This kit costs around $15, and is TOTALLY worth it for anyone that has baby/blunt/side/crazy/sane/Flock of Seagulls/whatever else bangs. Check out where you can find Bango to purchase fo' yo' own ass here, so you can quit jacking up your own ish.

Yep, like that.

P.S. I can't tell you how proud of myself I am that I made ZERO crude jokes in this post. Hooray for maturity!




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Fake Your Way to a Knocked Up Glow

We all know by now that the Duchess of somewhere (formerly common-type lady known as Kate Middleton) is pregnant with the royalest royal baby that's ever royaled. Sidebar: What if it comes out all ginger-y and Prince Harry like? Wouldn't that be awesome? Okay, I'm getting off track. Pregnant ladies are known for having that lovely ass glow of life, or something. But what about for people like me, who will probably never have a kid-in-the-uterus type situation happening? I'm more of the "fly solo around the world and die alone" type. (Possibly RIP, Ameila Erhardt.) Don't cry for me, Argentina, it's just my personality. I'd rather read 2.7 million books alone. (I had a sh*t ton of Book It free personal pan pizzas racked up when I was a kid.) Luckily, I have pawed through a lot of beauty products to MANUFACTURE THE GLOW. 

tarte amazonian clay blush in natural beauty, $25 & nars blush in orgasm, $28

I have found a beast of a combo when it comes to glowing cheeks. I start with tarte's amazonian clay blush (I use the color Natural Beauty, but you can do whatever rocks your ish.) for staying power. NOTHING stays on my oily mug like this blush does. Then I like to top it off with Nars blush in Orgasm, to give the cheeks a little shimmer and glow.

chanel's lucky stripes iridescent powder, $95 & physician's formula pearls of perfection, about $13

If you are looking for an all over face glow, I have found two great products at opposite ends of the rich b*tch scale. I was given the Chanel Lucky Stripes sometime/somewhere, and have found it to be quite friggin' delightful. I find myself using it when I want to be all glowy-faced and a pretty, pretty princess. But let's be real -- ish is expensive. If you are a little lighter in the pocketbook (I'm looking at myself), then the Physician's Formula Pearls of Perfection is a little more realistic. It's not AS great as the Chanel powder, but it's pretty damn good for a drugstore product, so don't cry over it and sh*t.

davine's nounou illuminating conditioner, $22.50 at drugstore.com

What about pregnant lady hair? I've always heard that they have great hair days, like for nine months. Must be hormones. Freaking science, man. I have been loving davine's Nounou Illuminating Conditioner to keep my hair looking flossy, lately. It's super gentle, and moisturizes hair without being heavy and gross.

Now don't be offended if people ask if you're expecting. It's not your empire-waited top, it's your gorgeous ass glow. Glow worms have nothing on you, boo!




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ANNNNND My Hair Transformation C'est Fini. (I'm Fancy and French.)

So, I got brave(ish) on T-gives and dyed my own hair. See the reveal after the jump and how I effed up...And ended up in Walmart at the start of Black Friday with all of the crazies.

via 90120gifs

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Random Homie: LUSH's Blousey Shampoo

LUSH, $25.95

I know I just talked about another LUSH product, but I'm in love with a non-stripper. (Of your hair, sick brains!) I was dying to try Blousey, the new LUSH 'poo for LLDH (Ladies who love dying their hair, duh.), and they graciously sent me a sample. The texture is very different from any shampoo I've used before -- it's kind of lumpy and thick. Which, to me, makes it all the more fun. It just FEELS like your mama and them made it in their home laboratory, or something. And it smells kind of like a chocolatey banana. I have to stop myself from grabbing a spork and taking a taste. Because I exclusively use golden-plated sporks to eat things. It gets pretty sudsy for a bananarama-packed product, and it still really gets my ol' greasy mop clean. I am really loving on this stuff hardcore. My hair feels soft, clean, and smells like the Bluth Banana Stand.

So, in other words, I give it a dancing David Silver. 'Tis the highest honor of them all.

via 90210gifs

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