She wouldn't be @britneyspears if she didn't wear a crop top to her son's soccer game. http://t.co/NwatMeDGUi pic.twitter.com/r9JBzSJaoB
— Yahoo Celebrity (@YahooCelebrity) March 16, 2015
Okay, so "breaking news" might be a bit of a stretch. This was a week ago, but have you met me? I'm the worst and also roughly 0.002% timely. But maybe you find it charming? (Insert that closed-eyed emoji thing. What is that thing supposed to rep, shame? It's what my dog does when she's embarrassed as f about pooping in the house, then just keeps pooping in the house, so I'll go with shame.)
Anyway, here's Britney Spears, warming all of our disgusting hearts with the warm sunshine of her awkwardly-cuffed jeans. If you don't love this woman after seeing her traipse around a GD soccer field with the plebs wearing probable Candie's™ wedges and sipping on a red Gatorade, then I don't even have words for your face anymore.
If you can't recognize a heavenly being walking among us like a damn episode of Touched by an Angel, then I must bid you good day, sir.
P.S. I was looking for a gif to insert here, as I am wont to due, when I came across this:
And I was all, "I love that. It's like I made it...myself. Oh, shit. I made that. Myself." Aaaaaaaand scene. Good day. I need some wine.