Ben Affleck is the kind of guy who would buy you a puppy for Christmas & not realize it was an irresponsible choice. pic.twitter.com/ySzmtL7ZU4— Sabrina Yawncough (@ms_yawncough) July 20, 2015
Have you heard the very, very important news that the Affleck family has a relatively new puppy? I don't know why you wouldn't already have this information, as it should be the hearth of your brain knowledge, but maybe you've been busy doing open heart surgeries for a living and haven't heard.
This unnamed fluffy bundle is undoubtedly adorable, but also clearly doesn't have time for your shit, or walking. He or she must be a fan of the Arianna Grande mode of transportation, which is understandable. Walking is for boring plebs.
Here are some other things this puppy doesn't have time for:
- Ben Affleck's (possibly/seemingly) ungrateful attitude about having such an adorable treasure.
- Ben's flippy wave bangs.
- To pick up some Salon Selectives from Target. She'll just get some later on Amazon Prime.
- To keep caring about the second season of True Detective. "But, really, is that Rose from Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead?" she keeps thinking. It's tedious on a puppy brain.
Keep doing you, fluffy baby. Don't let 'Fleck dull your shine. Or make your paws touch the ground.