Pretending to Be a Baller is Yawesome.

I'm here people! I schlepped my heavy ass bag to the hotel (Which is super fancy and awesome. I heard Kimora Lee Simmons is staying here, so it's no Motel 6.) And look at the toiletries -- L'Occitane! What the what??? You're like SUPPOSED to take these, right?

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And So It Begins...

I woke up a little, um, early. I'm nervous as hell. Ackkk!

And here's my suitcase. FOR LESS THAN THREE FREAKIN' DAYS, PEOPLE. Seriously, what is wrong with me? Oh, and it ended up weighing like 59 lbs. Not. Necessary.

I'm about to board the plane, so stand the eff by.


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EXCITING ASS BLOGGING NOTE

The time has come upon us. I am going on my badass trip to NY that I won with the Allure Beauty Blogger of the Year contest on Monday. So I will be live blogging/tweeting/something on the trip. I won't be doing any of my regular nonsense, because I'll be too busy ballin' out of control. (Just kidding, I'll be the only one wearing Forever 21 and Target or whatever.) So stay tuned here so you can see whatever fun ish that I will be getting into.




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HOPPY WEEKEND (Don't Worry, I Totally Hate Myself for That Horrendous Pun. Gross.)

                                                                     via buzzfeed

You are welcome for your new ringtone.

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Another of My Infamous MAHH-JOR Celebrity Run-Ins: 80's Fruit Edition

I had another celebrity sighting today, you guys. This one involved a comedy giant from the 80's...

That's right, people. I saw mother effin' GALLAGHER today in this b. If you are under 30, you might be all, "Whaaaaat?" So here's a little run down. My homeboy was a big prop comic (think Carrot Top without the eyeliner and ginge) that was best known for smashing watermelons with a sledgehammer. Are you LMFAO-ing yet? Anyone?

Fast forward to today. I'm working my day-to-day retail job (yes, I have one of those) and in walks Gallagher. I recognized that b immediately, but obvs said nothing to him. I'm only passive aggressively creepy as eff. But boo boo did leave a little something behind that completely confirmed my suspicions.

Yep, I photographed a stranger's used coffee cup. I have hit a new all-time low. Although the server at Bob Evans (He likes Bob Evans, you guys!!! Just like regular people.) had a tiny bit of trouble with the spelling, here is the complete confirmation that I'm a total on the street paparazzi.

I bring you ALL of the hot, breaking news. Be jealous. Sigh...

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Lazy Blogging: Read Something That I Already Wrote

pic via allure, via my phone

Yo, Trish McEvoy gave me some of her hair extension stash. BFFs??? Go read my Allure blog for this week. (She also gave me some badassery in makeup tips.)


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Breaking News -- Alexander Skarsgard is Still Super Hot

My fake boo boo, Alexi (just go with it) is in the new Aussie version of GQ Style. And gurrrrrl let me tell you, that ish is hot. Friggin' duh, right? Let's just look at the pictures, and I'll shut my dumb mouth.

Oh, hey. I don't have something in my eye. I'm just contemplating my own sexy. There's a lot to think about, y'all.

Oh, my scruff is rough and stuff. I'm such an manimal. (I don't even know what I'm saying right now.) Okay, let's all calm down. I need a little something to get my brain back to normalcy. (Shut up, it's a little normal...Sometimes.)

Nothing brings your mess of a mind back to reality like two baby bears holding paws. You're welcome.


All photos via GQ Australia (except the bears, obvs) Pin It