Easy Ish: Smokey Eye Tutorial

Don't be alarmed that I look like the dog from Lil' Rascals at the beginning of this video.

P.S. I never realized how freaking awkward I am until I started doing these videos. Pin It

Sorry, B. Your Ass Doesn't Look Like This.

Bad news, you guys. Walking around in Reebok Easytones doesn't make your ass any better. Reebok was just fined $25 million bucks by the Federal Trade Commission for ads like the one above, stating that wearing the sneakers tones and strengthens muscles more than wearing Tevas or whatever. The FTC says there is not research to back up Reeboks claims, and that ish doesn't fly. Good news is if you have blown bucks on these b*tches, Reebok is offering refunds.

Sorry, hoes. We're are just going to have to keep hoofing it and lunging and crap. Life sucks. Pin It

BORED.

I'm sorry, this ish looks boring as hell. Nene's fired up about being rich? Kim's talking about her fetus' wiener? Andy Cohen, get your crap together before I slap that lazy eye straight. News flash: B's watch RHW of wherever to watch trash and fighting. Not to hear about b's stock portfolios. NEXT! Pin It

Jessica Simpson is Pregnant...Or Something...

So the rags are yammering about Jessica Simpson (I always want to type "Yessica." WTF is wrong with me?) being pregnant with ol' gold digger guy's baby. If she is, or isn't, whatever. The best part of this story is the quote from the "source" given to inTouch Weekly.

“She’s already having kooky cravings!” a friend shares, especially nacho chips dipped in chocolate — “which satisfy her urge for salty and sweet” — cheese-flavored popcorn and non-alcoholic margaritas.

Now, despite the fact that there will be one more “guest” (and that “Jessica might have to take out her dress a bit”), their plans to marry in November haven’t changed.

While it’s true that not everyone would consider the timing ideal, the friend says the couple considers the baby to be “the best wedding gift ever.” Luckily, she’s not due ’til spring, leaving them just enough time to be newlyweds before new parents.

Kooky cravings? Non-alcoholic margaritas? Best wedding gift ever? If I was Yessica (eff it), I would be less pissed about my friend talking to a tabloid and more pissed that I was friends with a douche that would talk like this. "Annoying as Eff DB of the Day Award" (it's very prestigious) goes to you, anonymous source! Pin It

Easy Fall Fashion: 1 Dress, 3 Ways

Okay, b's. It's officially fall! I made another sh*tty (yet hopefully somewhat helpful) vid to show you a few ways to style one simple fall dress.



Let me know what you guys would like more videos/posts about! Pin It

Boardwalk Empire Recap:

 Listen, Boardwalk. I need more of this in my life.

 Like 20 seconds an episode is not going to cut it to fill my crazy ho tank. Let's discuss the premiere!

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I'm a Douche...

I made an eyebrow tutorial video. It's my first one, so I kind of suck. Get your tomatoes ready...

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