Can we Timeshare This or Something?

Holly Golightly's townhouse made famous by Breakfast at Tiffany's is for sale for almost $6 million. Anyone want to go one-millionth-sies with me? You can check out more pictures of the place, which was previously owned by some muckety muck banker dude that was collared for insider trading, over at Curbed.

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Stand By...

C. Stodd made a video for Funny or Die, which will be released on Thursday. AND it was directed by Seinfeld's Jason Alexander. Oooookay? I don't even know where to go from here. Stay tuned so we can talk ish on Thursday...

P.S. To tide you over, go check this out from Gallery of the Absurd.


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Urban Farmers' Market

Shirt: Miley Cyrus for Walmart (don't judge me)

Sweater: Karlie, find retailer here

Jeans: Blank Denim, Similar here

Boots: Old Navy, buy here

Bracelet: Target headband from circa 2004

Necklace: By boe, similar here

I had to cut my head off. I didn't have makeup on yet, and it was tragic. That's Wiggy in the background, with a cameo by a few ghosts in the form of light orbs. Yay?

This is what I wore to a local farmers' market. Because, yes, every day is an opportunity to wear something that skews at least slightly into costume territory. Pin It

WTF, Stacy Ferguson?

Pic via Huffington Post

Fergie showed up to something called "The Night of Firsts" ( I effing hope so!) wearing this hot mess. #1 You can't zip it. #2 You're wearing a Felix the Cat dress. #3 You look uncomfortable as hell, like a b that can't zip her dress up. Oh, wait...

This is the only way that Felix the Cat should be making appearances.

And when's the last time you saw one of those? Probably when you looked like this.

You and J Love should have showed up like this last night. That would have been the realness.

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Is This Douchey? I Feel Douchey.

Jacket: Target, a million years ago

Shirt: Thrift store, Juicy Couture

Leggings: Brittney, similar here

Socks: Target

Boots: Old Navy, buy here

Necklace: Forever 21, similar (and kind of cooler) here

So I had a few (real and not imaginary) people ask me to do blog posts with my Outfit of the Day. Like, what I wore that day and whatnot. I know a lot of bloggers do this, and a lot of them are really great. But, I feel like who the eff am I that you would give half a crap about what I wore? So here is my first (and possibly last) OOTD post.

Are you guys into this at all? If so, tell me if you want me to do this fairly regularly. I will take silence as an answer of you think that I'm a douche.

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Why Do I Feel Funny?

With the recent leak of the cover, I have been feverishly thinking (Not that way, sick brains!) about Lindsay Lohan's soon to be released Playboy issue. I mean, there is a lot of potential for awkwardness. It had to be re-shot, so what kind of crap was produced in the first go-round? Was this pre or post fixing the meth teeth? I can't remember, and I'm too freaking lazy to google it. Am I on meth?

Anyway, all of this got me thinking about celebrities posing for Playboy or simply being on the cover. There have been a lot. Some good, some bad, some that are just...awkward. So here's my list of the top five most awkward celebrity Playboy cover models and/or pictorials.

Honorable (or horrible) Mention: Shannen Doherty in German (???) Playboy

What in the hell IS this? Nobody does this to Brenda Walsh's face! This mess looks like it was painted by a blind monk that worked as Kelly Taylor dictated. Hell to the naw! (Copyright: Whitney Houston)

# 5 Teri Polo

I personally enjoy my Teri Polo starring alongside the likes of Ben Stiller and Robert De Niro in family friendly-ish films, not attempting to mouth love a strawberry and showing me her hootenanny. No ma'am.

# 4 Carnie Wilson, Tiffany, and Debbie Gibson (TIE!)

I can declare a tie! Shut your mouth. Don't get me wrong, they all looked great for their a-hem "spreads" (I'm sorry, gross.), but this is how I like and picture my Carnie, Tiffany, and Debbie (I'm not calling you Debrah) Gibson.

Now THIS is glamor, okay Carnie? Tell me you can tear your eyes away from those earrings. I dare you!

Can't you just SMELL the Electric Youth perfume wafting from this photo? And that hat? It beats boobs any day, any time.

 

Speaking of hats, can you even with this? Because I sure as hell can! This picture is what happens when a festive Christmas wreath marries a door knocker and births a ginger angel.

# 3 Latoya Jackson

We all know that Toy Toy is the cray cray of the Jackson clan (which is really saying something), but on the real I can't even mess with this cover. Between the studded jacket, those nails, and the glitter star earring that's bigger than her face, I can't even hate on this magical carpet ride.

# 2 Donald Trump

Why? And...No.

# 1 Candice Bergen

This is like finding a video of your parents doing it. Just a whole big ol' bag of no. What would Murphy Brown say about this? I would rather see Miles and the painter/handyman/whatever that dude did in a warm embrace than this. (I want to see that anyway.)

At least she didn't get nakey. That's something her shoulder pads could never unsee. Pin It

Ma'am, Your Boob Is Staring at Me...Angrily.

Photo via Huffington Post

Let's all just drink in this Sour Sally. This is the wife of one of the dudes that created Angry Birds, angrily donning an Angry Bird-themed dress. Why so glum, chum? Maybe she's just getting into character? Or maybe she's pissed that she kind of looks like she was wearing a normal red satin dress, and on the way in she somehow had a crazy, wacky mishap that ripped the bodice of her dress. She happened upon a display of  Angry Bird kites in the lobby of this party (which is probs for some kind of A.B. ish), and she resourcefully patched up her dress with said kite! I bet that's it. I'm sure this b didn't pay 8 bajillion dollars for this mess. (Slash, she totally did.) Sigh.

This post brought to you by Angry Birds.

(No, it's totally not. It's brought to you by me, an unemployed, bored person, but that would be cool.)

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