Creepy Ass Beauty: I Like to Live Vicariously Through Dolls.

I was kind of a spoiled kid. I had not one, but all three (that was all that was available at the time) of the American Girl dolls -- Kirsten, Molly, and Samantha. My favorite was Samantha, by far. She was a hoity toity b, and came with a freakin' velvet clutch and a fancy ass, albeit somewhat ill-fitting, hat. How can you hate on that ish?

If you guys are feeling a little bit fuzzy on what Samatha looked like, here she is:

Oh, you fancy, huh?

That girl looks guuuurd, right? With ol' Sam (That was her nickname, it was in the story, you guys!) being my favorite toy of my privileged-ass childhood, what's better than finding beauty products that totally make me think of my OG homegirl?

Burberry Brit Eau de Parfum, $72

My first Samantha pick is Burberry Brit perfume. I mean, seriously?!? Boo Boo's dress could have totally been a Burberry print. Plus, she's a fancy b, and Burberry is totally for fancy people.

Smashbox Master Class 11 Meet the Masters Palette, $59

Next up is this badass limited edition palette from Smashbox. Samantha was a painter (you could buy that mess for extra), so this palette would totally speak to her artistic sensibilities. I need this bad boy in my life. Look at all the fun ish you get in this beast!

Amika 4 Piece Interchangeable Barrel Curler Set, $175

Speaking of stuff I want, how freaking cool is this barrel curler set? You can switch out the barrel of the wand to achieve different tightness of curls, ranging from curly Sue to mermaid. Okay, I made that part up, but you get what I'm throwing down here. This is perfect for Samantha, because homeslice had really good hair. It had the perfect amount of wave, and was super shiny. Not like my girl, Kristen. Her mop was a hot mess. Sadness.

LAFCO Tree House (Majestic Oak) Candle, $55

I have a weakness for expensive ass soy candles. This one smells like a tree house, apparently. And that is perfect for Samantha, because according to her American Girl Dolls Wiki page (That exists!!!), "She has a rough side such as climbing trees and feels it is very hard to be a young lady." Anything that costs $55 has to smell amaze, right?

Velvet Bow Stretch Headband, $16

Obviously, Samantha has a strong affection for both velvet and bows (Have you SEEN the size of her head bows?), so this cute Esty headband would be perfect for her. It would also be perfect for me, but that's neither here nor there.

Samantha was one of my first style icons, sadly. Well maybe She-Ra, Stawberry Shortcake (That was a good-smelling b.), or Jem were my FIRST first. Who did you love as a kid? Did you have any American Girl dolls?


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