GUUUUUURL of the Day: Lil' Waynes NEWEST Face Tattoo. (The Old Ones are Kind of Grandfathered in, I Guess.)

pic via spin

I mean, I really didn't even think that this needed to be said, but apparently, it does: Tattooing sh*t on your face is not a great idea. Not only did Lil' Wayne (Side note -- how long in life can one be known as "Lil'" whatever? Is there an age cap on that? I feel like if you are a septuagenarian, or something, it's gone on far too long.) get another face tattoo, but this one reads "BAKED" in squares. It's apparently in reference to a skateboard company competitor? Or something? I don't know, you go try to figure that mess out. I'm far, far too old to know what the eff all of this means.

One thing that I do feel pretty, pretty confident about is not getting a tattoo...on your face. Especially when it's a possible advertising ploy. Like, you realize that is your FACE face, right? And you already have a bunch of OTHER tattoos on that b? You only have one forehead, Lil'. Let's not make it a cluttered Penny Saver advertising page. IT'S YOUR FACE, MAN.

via realitytvgifs

You look crazy.



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GUUUUUURL of the Day: Scarlett Johansson's Pre-K Tattoo

So Scarlett Johansson got a new tattoo...Yep. She sure did. I thought that she might've tattooed it on her own body from the looks of it, but apparently some graffiti artist designed it. Okay. I feel like it would have looked better if one of those bigger-sized My Little Ponies heated up his hoof with a gas station lighter and stomped on homegirl's rib cage. I tried to find a picture of the size of MLP I'm talking about, but instead I found whatever the hell this is:

People are into some weird ish, aren't they? But maybe a dude wearing this outfit tattooed her. That would make a whole lotta sense.

P.S. I'm pretty sure I got flagged by the FBI for being on whatever skeevy ass site I visited getting that picture. Heeeey! (See what I did there?)



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BREAKING NEWS: Guess Who, Who, Who Got an Owl Tattoo?

You can go ahead and virtually punch me in the face for that stupid ish. The answer is Justin Bieber.

And I know this because I follow Biebs on instagram, and am freely accepting your judgement for this. He added the owl tatt next to his Ask Jeeves tattoo, which is a nice accompaniment. (No! It's not an Ask Jeeves tattoo. That would just be silly. Errmmm.) It also looks like the owl might be perched on a paint brush or a broom. So it's either a witch or artist owl. Yay!



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GUUUUUURL of the Day: Eva Longoria's Ex-Dude Tattoos

pic via tmz

Eva Longoria has been divorced from that Tony Parker dude for a while now. So she's apparently getting her THREE tattoos that are dedicated to his ass lasered off, which seems like a good idea. One is even allegedly near/on/in close proximity to her lady business/swimsuit area. So here's the thing, E Long. One should probably not get a gentleman's name tattooed on any no-no spot. If that mess doesn't work out -- which it did not in this case -- that's just a sticky-icky sitch down there. (Gross. Sorry.) How are you supposed to get on with your life, and read your book club book in the tub or whatever, when you keep seeing ol' guv'nor's name all up in your place?

So ladies, (I'm looking at you, too, Angie Jolie. BILLY BOB THORNTON? Really?) can we please stop tattooing guys' names on our flowery bits? If you're feeling crazy, go vajazzle yourself until your heart's content. And for that, Eva, you and your ex-man tattoos are the GUUUURL of the day.




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Did Rihanna Really Get 'Thug Life' Tattooed on Her Fingers?

Listen, young lady. I know you think this all cool and ish, but one day it won't be. And isn't getting 'Thug Life' tattooed in PINK kind of an oxymoron? And John Lennon does not endorse this action. But you know where the poster of your t-shirt image does belong?

End of Discussion.


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