Friday, November 14, 2014

I Love Black Polish And I Cannot Lie

Don't be afraid of black nail polish. It's come a long way from the coloring-in-your-fingernails-with-a-sharpie days. It now can really range anywhere from classy-lady-who-lunches to edgy like woah.

Glossy and Flossy

sinful colors in black on black + out the door top coat

Shiny black polish is like classic red polish with a slight emo edge. It goes with anything, and is perfect for any occasion. Going to Quiznos to pick up some kind of toasted something-or-other? Black nail polish. Trying on wedding dresses for an actual wedding or in a SATC ironic way? Black nail polish. Watching Dumb and Dumber To? Please don't. And also, black nail polish.

Okay, end of post! JK, JK. We have a long-ass way to go and many options ahead of us.

Flat Matte

sinful colors black on black + opi matte top coat

I really do apologize for how shitty that I am at painting my nails in a non-human garbage manner. In fact, I made this gif just for this situation. (Okay, I didn't. I made it because it should exist in the universe.)

Anyway, back to the sauce. Matte black nails are glossy black nails' IDGAF sister that dyes her hair with Kool-Aid. She also has a part-time job at Hot Topic, but mostly because of its close proximity to Auntie Anne's Pretzels. I feel her in my heart.

P.S. If you get sick of the matte look, you can just throw a top coat on that mess and you're back to shining bright like a cubic zirconia.

Alt black

If I still haven't convinced you that black nails are boss shit, then maybe I can interest you in an almost-black polish? If you really need a tiny dab of color in your nail life, I present you with these options (from left to right): CND Midnight Sapphire, Essie Devil's Advocate, OPI Here Today...Aragon Tomorrow, OPI Suzi Skis in the Pyrenees. All of these boo boos look pretty much black, but in direct lighting -- blam, pow -- a little color. Get on my darkness level.

See? Black nail polish is crazy versatile. And if you still don't aren't feeling it, you can just paint your nails pinky and sparkly. I still love you the most.

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