Caitlyn Jenner Is More Beautiful Than All Of Us

So proud of @Caitlyn_Jenner. #callmecaitlyn pic.twitter.com/V7hnqGtHR7

— The Advocate (@TheAdvocateMag) June 1, 2015

Caitlyn Jenner graced us with her glam gorgeousness for the first time today, and despite her looking roughly 209834098238 times prettier than me, I am thrilled. (I'm also pretty, pretty pleased that she looks so similar to the queen that is Jessica Lange.) Waiting 65 years to actually be on the outside the person you've always felt like on the inside is way too long, especially when she's as lovely and glamorous as this beautiful being.

Ugh, yes. So in love w #CallMeCaitlyn. She's killing it. Follow your heart, do what makes you happy💖 @Caitlyn_Jenner pic.twitter.com/MIyeWVrGC8

— Vanecia (@vaneciaruiz) June 1, 2015

I am of the opinion that I hope that one day this won't have to be big news, and that people can just be themselves from the time they traipse out of the damn womb. But for the time being, I'm so glad that this is such big news.

If an oldie-type that has never known a trans person, but loved the Bruce Jenner that was a badass Olympian, can crack their mind open a little more to accept and understand people that are different from themselves because of Caitlyn's public journey, I am 'bout it, 'bout it, regardless of her relation to a gaggle of Kardashians. And you can't deny the power of those sexy gams. That shit is a universal love language.

Happy Birthday, Caitlyn. You are even more gorgeous than I could have imagined.




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BREAKING NEWS: Britney Wears A Crop Top, Looks Like An Angel

She wouldn't be @britneyspears if she didn't wear a crop top to her son's soccer game. http://t.co/NwatMeDGUi pic.twitter.com/r9JBzSJaoB
— Yahoo Celebrity (@YahooCelebrity) March 16, 2015

Okay, so "breaking news" might be a bit of a stretch. This was a week ago, but have you met me? I'm the worst and also roughly 0.002% timely. But maybe you find it charming? (Insert that closed-eyed emoji thing. What is that thing supposed to rep, shame? It's what my dog does when she's embarrassed as f about pooping in the house, then just keeps pooping in the house, so I'll go with shame.)

Anyway, here's Britney Spears, warming all of our disgusting hearts with the warm sunshine of her awkwardly-cuffed jeans. If you don't love this woman after seeing her traipse around a GD soccer field with the plebs wearing probable Candie's™ wedges and sipping on a red Gatorade, then I don't even have words for your face anymore.

If you can't recognize a heavenly being walking among us like a damn episode of Touched by an Angel, then I must bid you good day, sir.

P.S. I was looking for a gif to insert here, as I am wont to due, when I came across this:

And I was all, "I love that. It's like I made it...myself. Oh, shit. I made that. Myself." Aaaaaaaand scene. Good day. I need some wine.







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