I wish a pterodactyl would swoop down right now and rip out my eyeballs and ear holes. Where are the parents of this child? Is his mom one of the b's booty popping in his face? Where the eff is Chris Hansen?
P.S. This dude is 6. Like in kindergarten 6.
Hurry! I need something to make me feel like a human again.
Look at that widdle tongue! This hamster is doing more age appropriate stuff than that kid. Damn.
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