Showing posts with label Makeup. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Makeup. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Drugstore Darlings: Let's Check Out The Maybelline The Nudes Palette

Gather around for a very important storytime, kids. There was once a lady that loved makeup a little too much for her own good. And sometimes when a person really, really wants to find a palette that they think they'll love on their eyeball lids, they will drive to eight friggin' different drugstores to find said palette. Especially when the palette seems super-affordable and dreamy. And when the lady was united with the palette, she was happy.


THE END. JK! That's just the beginning. And I'm a horrible storyteller. And it's probably slightly inappropriate to tell kids a story about anything called "The Nudes." Keep the youths away from me.


I was pretty damn excited about finally copping this palette. I actually got it for about $7, because Walgreens was having some sort of Maybelline sale. I can't be bothered with the details, because I was on a "GOTCHA B!" high, but I think it typically retails for $12-ish in drugstores.


Here's a close-up look at the shadows and swatches of all of the colors. The eyeshadows are almost evenly split between matte and shimmery finishes, which is a pretty bomb and refreshing find. AIN'T NOBODY THAT WANTS ALL SHIMMERY SHADOW PALETTES, COSMETIC COMPANIES. STOP THE INSANITY.

The matte colors (with the exception of the base/highlight shade) would also all be perfect doubling as brow powders, which is always a nice bonus.

I decided to do a mini head-to-head challenge pitting The Nudes against Urban Decay's OG Naked Palette. The color schemes are pretty similar, so I devoted one eyeball to each palette, and used my wee wee brain (and a camera) to document the differences. (Side note: Please ignore my scaly ass eyelid. I'm using a new skin treatment, and it wants my skin to be dry like whoa.)


I tried to pick similar colors in both palettes to create an as-close-to-identical eye as possible. The verdict? Crazy close, non?

There are a few major differences that I noticed between the two palettes. The spendy ass UD shadows are a lot softer and more blend-y, but almost to a fault. As you can see on the UD lid, the shadows almost blend together a little TOO well, if you know what I'm sayin'. On the other hand, the Maybelline shadows are pretty chalky in texture, but the colors almost seem richer than their more expensive comrades. (The exception were with the lighter/highlighting shades. Those weren't very vibrant. At all.)

Bottom line -- I'm not going to blow smoke up ye olde bung-hole and say, "OWROWIQRJF IT'S JUST LIKE A ONE BILLION DOLLAR PALETTE! WHEEEE!" But, it's really damn great for drugstore eyeshadows. And in some ways it's even better. It's definitely worth them handful of bones, for serious.


So now you can feel free to spend your cash flow on country clubs, strip clubs, or wherever you want, ya' freak bitch!



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Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Mug Makeover: Clueless (Cher Horowitz) Edition


I blame the friggin' "Fancy" video. For everything, really, but especially for re-resurrecting (yep, not a word) my Cher Horowitz beauty infatuation. I even wrote about this bangin' cinematic moment briefly in this Allure post, but that couldn't satiate my Clueless hunger.


So I decided that I really had no choice but to do a Mug Makeover for my favorite CH moment. Bonus points for the fact that it's super-easy to duplicate.

P.S. CLUELESS IS ON MF-ING NETFLIX, YOU GUYS, GET EXCITED.


The first step is to apply a nude/light brown matte eyeshadow to your lids. I used "Naked" from Urban Decay.


Next you'll want to line your upper waterline with a waterproof black liner (I used UD 24/7 Eye Pencil in "Zero") to make you look like you've got one billion lashes without mimicking Taylor Momsen's eyeliner habit. Because this eyeball look is trés natural, we're swapping out the black liner for brown (like MUFE Aqua Eyes liner in "Matte Brown") when it comes to lining your upper lid. Let the bottom lid go completely sans liner, then mascara away. I only did one coat (and a half), because Cher's makeup isn't very lash-centric.


For brows, I only defined the tail with Anastasia Dipbrow Pomade in "Dark Brown." I also tried to make my brows a slightly straighter shape because, doy, that's what Cher has going on.


Throw on some bright pink blush (like MAC Blush in "Dollymix"). Go for something bright and girly with the world's tiniest touch of shimmer. TINIEST.


Finish your face with a solid nude lip. I started with a matte lipstick (Wet n Wild MegaLast in "Bare it All"), then topped it of with a shiny nude 'stick (L'Oreal Colour Riche Caress Stick in "Sheer Linen"). The idea is to have a decent amount of lip color with a touch of shine.





Okay, your face is done and you're a total Betty, but now let's tackle that mop. Start by straightening your hair, turning it under at the ends like you're doing "the Rachel" -- the later years. Then pull your hair into a really high ponytail, but don't make it too tight and pull it slightly to one side.

Grab a pen (or rat tail comb, if you're fancy), and pull out the section of hair close to your forehead a little. Then pull out some of the hairs around your face to make it grown and sexy. And messy.

If your pony needs a little more oomph, you can put a clip inside the back of your 'tail. It's like a little hair bra. You know -- it supports that shit and pushes it up.


That's the end! Your you-to-Clue(less) Mug Makeover is complete. Enjoy your new life as a rich, 90s, Beverly Hills teenager. I'll just be over here going about my life trying to not be a full-on Monet.

P.P.S. Why did this electronic Fashion Plates fabulous-ity never become a thing? You're boring, technology.



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Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Drugstore Beauty Haul (With A Dash Of Sephora)



I kind of bought a lot of shit last week, so I decided to make a haul video, even though I kind of hate them. So here's nine minutes of your time that you'll never get back, but check it out if you want to see all of the craps that I bought. If not, that's cool.


I guess...I guess I'll just see you around, then.



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Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Mug Makeover: Teen Witch Edition

There are very few things that are important to me in life. I'm usually a "give zero effs" kind of gal (bleh), but that does not hold true when it comes to one of my favorite movies of all friggin' time -- Teen Witch.


If you can't get down with an 80s movie that involves witchcraft and chicanery for popularity's sake, heavy use of tutus and denim jackets, and delightfully awkward rapping, then I don't have time for your silly nonsense. So when I tell you that I have created a Teen Witch beauty tutorial, your ass should not be surprised.

And without further dramatics, I present to you my most meaningful beauty look that I have ever created. Sadly, it's not the old lady witch that was also in Poltergeist. Maybe next time.


I would recommend using a sturdy-ass, Aqua Net-esque hairspray if you want your hair to stay. I just used texturizing spray because I wasn't trying to be hard-haired and authentically 80s, so, whatever. Choose your own hair adventure.


You can totally use an eyeshadow as a brow powder. Just please, for the love of Yeezus, CHOOSE A DAMN MATTE SHADOW.


Use whatever neutral eyeshadow you've got hanging around for this part. I prefer to do shimmery on the lid and matte on the crease, but do what your heart tells you to. Especially if you're a young buck. Your eyelids still have years sans-crepe, so play on, playa.

If you're oily, go for a gel liner or a long-wear liner, or you WILL look a hot mess in 13.5 minutes.



Use whichever gloss or 'stick you're into, just keep it in the coral or peach tones. I think that that's the theme of the day -- do whatever the hell you want. Kind of.


Okay, all done! My hair's not AS 80s as real Louise's, but you get the vibe. Do you guys love Tee Dubs as much as I do? Does anyone even know what I'm talking about right now?


Supersonic, idiotic, disconnecting, not respecting, who would really ever wanna go and top that?!?


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Monday, July 14, 2014

What's Up, Smashbox Master Class Palette III?

I was forced to shclep my lazy ass across town to the ol' Sephora today, because I was dangerously low on the love of my life, the Marc Jacobs Magic Marc'er. I've shoved 10 months of use in a six month expiration bag with that puppy, and it was way past friggin' time. Drier than a bone status.

While I was re-upping on my homie, OF COURSE my eyes had to wander over the rest of the store's offerings. What am I, a nun? While on this peruse-fest, my eyeballs fell upon a true beauty: the Smashbox Master Class Palette III -- Color & Contour. I really was in no mood to purchase this mofo. It's $65, and I'm not exactly at Scrooge McDuck-levels of wealth right now.


But when I cracked this b open, I knew I was sold. Guess I'll eat garbage the rest of the month. Whatever. The first thing that you see are several tutorial sheets on how to do a bunch of fun shit like contouring and specific fancy eyeball things. The back cover has blank face charts so you can create your own little makeup looks. So artsy! It's very fashion plates-y and exciting.

Then you get to the real good good. Try to contain your oooooh and ahhhhs. TRY, I SAY!


What really convinced be to get this thing was the wide variety of shades in shadows and the inclusion of not only three totally wearable blushes, but also completely matte versions of a countour color, bronzer and highlighter. It's pretty much as close to perfection as anything can get for my ass. And eyelids. And face parts.



 I decided to just play around a tiny bit with some of the brighter and more unique colors. I really like a solid 97% of the shadows, and I feel like it might make my mediocre ass branch out a little more and use more color on my eyes.




I also took a hot minute to throw some contour/highlight/blush-type characters on my mug. Everything blends really, really well, and I feel like it will work well for most skin tones. My very fair and deeper skinned peeps, you might want to check the palette in person to see if the countouring shades would work for you.

Overall, here's my justification for getting this b: if I'm paying $50-ish a palette for ten-ish shadows, why in effs sake would I not plop down 15 more clams for, like, four times as much shit? This is a no doy for me. Broke assness be damned.


If you want to see all the specifics on this baby, check it here.



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Saturday, June 28, 2014

Mug Makeover: Gwen Stefani Edition

The other day I was reading this article over at Refinery29, and came across this bomb picture of Gwen Stefani. It was like watching Jonathan Brandis (RIP) in Ladybugs** -- I fell in love all over again. GS is usually looking consistently fly, so it's not like I expected anything different from her ass, but I feel like this makeup look is slightly different from her regular deal and I wanted that shit on my face immediately.

pic via refinery29
I've recreated it below in a few easy steps, so read on, reader, if you want Gwennie's glorious face on your face. (Without getting all Buffalo Bill-y and illegal.)


P.S. I would (almost but not quite) literally kill for that kimono.

I started with the eyes, which are really pretty simple and low key, with a touch of shimmer. (But NOT glitter, the nemesis of soul windows everywhere.) I'm using the Lorac Starry-Eyed Baked Eye Shadow Trio in Pro Star, which I can't friggin' find anywhere, but this Superstar palette ($27) is super-similar.


Start by applying a shimmery brown shadow from the crease to the lash line.


Follow up by using a light bronze-y eyeshadow in the crease and also on the bottom lash line.


Next apply some black liner on the upper lash line only. I'm pretty ride-or-die liquid liner in this situation, but live your life and use whatever eyeliner you like. I used the Marc Jacobs Magic Marc'er Precision Pen Waterproof Eyeliner ($30) because I LOVE THAT SHIT.


Finish off with a powerful mascara, because Gwen's lashes be bangin' in this face case. I'm using Rimmel Scandaleyes Rockin' Curves Mascara ($6.99), that CVS Beauty Club so kindly sent me to sample, along with the Rimmel lipstick that I use in a hot minute. The mascara is actually pretty boss. It makes my lashes seem as long as a Real Housewives Reunion show, parts one through seven, but 309485% less boring.


For lips, I started by lining with MAKE UP FOR EVER Aqua Lip Waterproof Lipliner Pencil in Bright Baby Pink ($19), because it's just what I happened to have lying around. Once again, use what you wish, but definitely use a liner with a bright lip like this to prevent that rude bitch, lipstick feathering.


The last step is to throw on a bright reddish-pink lipstick, like Rimmel Moisture Renew Lipstick in As You Want Victoria ($6.99). I really enjoy the shade of this 'stick, but I had to get used to the moisturizing aspect. I'm usually more of a matte lip kind of mofo, so I had to do some reapplying as the hours ticked by. But the formula feels like a dream, so it's worth the extra seconds of reapply time.


That's it, here's the finished product. I might not look as much like a flawless creamy-skinned elf as Gwen, but I'm completely into this face.


What do you guys think? Are you into Mizz Gwen's look? You don't even know how hard I had to fight against making a "Hella Good" reference here, so tell your brains "you're welcome" for the reprieve from my typical terrible puns.

** I used to carry around a folded-up pictures of Jonathan Brandis in my pocket in Elementary school. I was an avid reader of Tiger Beat, Big Bopper, et al, and I would rip out pictures of JB and carry them until they pretty much deteriorated into ransom-letter-like scraps.



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Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Allure Insiders Get The Look: Orange Is The New Black Makeover Mashup



The subject of this week's Allure Insiders video is one of my favorites (uh, doy). I took three of my favorite characters from my beloved OITNB and created a mashup look from little pieces of all of them. Watch on to see who I chose.

And if you aren't caught up on the show, what the eff are you waiting on? Head over to Netflix and binge-watch the hell of it like any sane person would, then come back over hear and lets talk about it! (I finished this weekend, obviously.)


P.S. If you don't want to "boop" Suzanne, I don't even know you.




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Monday, June 2, 2014

Video Time: Every-Damn-Thing I Use On The Daily



I made a crazy, long ass video on pretty much every friggin' thing that I use beauty-wise (and some random shit) every day. You are probably throwing me an "I give exactly zero effs" side eye through the interwebs right now, so feel free to skip this video if you aren't interested in my mess of a daily life.

If you are into this, I cover everything from skin care products to deodorant, to makeup and the earrings I've been wearing for a solid four years. If you have any questions about anything I mention, holler at your girl in the comments.




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Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Allure Insiders Get The Look: Mariah Carey "Honey" Tutorial



MY FIRST ALLURE INSIDERS VIDEO IS OUT, YOU GUYS. This one is near and dear to my heart because it's all about Mariah Carey. But not now-times Mariah, I'm all about MC in the "Honey" video. It's one of my favorites because it combines so many incredible things: Kangol hats, jet skis, zip-up swimwear and clip-on ponytails. So, check it out and see what you think.

I'll be coming out with a new video every other Tuesday, so I'll post them here if you feel like perusing the goodies.

P.S. I've been out of town for the past several days, so I'll get back to the reg when I get back into town tomorrow night. Sorry for being a crap-ster, part 23984039284.







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Tuesday, May 20, 2014

The Summer Beauty Stuffs I Never Knew I Needed (Until Now)

I'm figuratively dying, man. And not even in a friggin' cerebral, existential crisis kind of way. I'm talking about how it's hot as shit, and I want to cry and/or never, ever leave my house because it's over 100 degrees outside. Which is an INSANE temperature to expect a human to exist normally. (RIP, polar ice caps.)


In order to ease my First World pains, I've done some beauty soul-searching to find products that a) make me feel better, and b) help me to semi-live a life that seems like it's happening in a post-apocalyptic Earth. Even if it doesn't yet feel like the ninth ring of Hell where you're living, ANTI-WINTER IS COMING, so you better step to planning.

Alt White Mani


My love for a fresh-to-death white polish job is right up there (almost) with my fondness for wine-drinking times. But after awhile I get a little bored with the same ol' thang, and want to find a way to mix it up when it comes to that bright white mani. Don't worry your pretty little head, because I've found a couple options to update this whole deal. 

My first alternative (above) was sampled to me by the indie polish brand Seven and Parker. The shade is called "Mr. White," and it's a frosty, opaque white with a touch of silver, from the brand's upcoming Reservoir collection. It's not available just quite yet, put S&P's "Girl in Pale Pink Coat" is a very pale pink shimmery polish that has a similar feel. Or just keep an eye out on the Seven and Parker website for "Mr. White" to become available. This is the perfect polish for a cool-toned white option, and I can't get enough.


If warm tones are more your thing, my girls at Floss Gloss sent me some bomb white substitutes. "Biscuits" is an almost buttery cream color, while "Selena Corpus Crystalina" is a sheer white glitter that's great to top off whatever polish you're currently feeling. Or you can layer them together and create a sugary, all-white-everything buttered biscuit dream. It's your world, baby.

Skindinavia: The Makeup Primer Spray


I begged Skindinavia to send me some of their brand new Primer Spray ($35), because I pretty much feel the need to use a primer anytime I wear foundation, but with this hot ass existence currently happening, the thought of slathering another layer of something on my face is less than mf-ing appealing. This formula is a super-lightweight spray, so it's perfect for the summertimes. It made my foundation stay put even after going to the gym because, YES, I'm one of THOSE that wears makeup to workout. I know, I'm the worst.

I actually took a picture of my hand using the primer with foundation, then without, but my embarrassment over my extremely poor hand selfie-ing skills prevented me from posting it. I do have some standards, believe it or not. But the with-primered  hand foundation was much, much smoother than the sans-primered hand. Just trust me on this one.

Tarte: Not So Slick Blotting Papers


Reason number 309485039 that crazy hot weather can suck it? It gets my oil glands kickin' into overdrive. And although I will use those rubbery drugstore blotting papers (as well as toilet paper, receipts and the back of my hand) in a pinch, I've always been a little bothered by what exactly those little homies are made from. Bike tires? Old scrunchie elastics?

I didn't worry about that at all when tarte sent me these tarte not so slick blotting papers ($10) to try. They're naturally-derived, but still sop up oil better than the longest Target receipt. CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT.

Powerful Drugstore Lips


Spring and Summer make me want to wear the hell out of a heavy-hitting lipstick. And because I like a variety to spice up my mouth area, it's even better if that 'stick is super-affordable. I've accumulated a pretty boss arsenal of lovely lipsticks, but these two just keep popping up on my lips. As you can see, these mofos are well-loved/used and abused.

I've already shared my deep affections for NYX Matte Lipstick in "Indie Flick" ($6), but it bears repeating. That's how into this lipstick I am. A new(ish) love for me is the even lower-priced Wet n Wild MegaLast Lip Color in "Sugar Plum Fairy" ($1.89 at Walgreens). You literally don't get more affordable for a bangin' lipstick than that. What make these an even better deal? They both are highly-pigmented and last all the live-long day. Top that!


P.S. Robin Lively is the best Lively. Don't argue with me.

Brush on Block


I almost didn't include this little guy in this round-up, but I use it a ton so it just felt necessary. But full disclosure on this one: someone sent this to me FOREVER ago to try, and I just now started using it. When I went to get all the deets on it today, I noticed that what I've been using expired a year ago (don't care, 10/10 will still use), and also the company and packaging seems to be completely different. Either way, I really think that this is a great product, so I'll tell you all of the current info.

Brush on Block ($30) is an SPF 30 mineral powder sunscreen with a retractable brush protector thing-y on it, which makes it really portable and easy to use and store. The powder actually comes through the makeup brush, so you just brush it all over your face before you go outside. I like to walk to a coffee shop that's about half a mile from my house a few mornings a week, and this is so easy to brush on in the morning without worrying about rubbing on a sticky ass SPF lotion. It really meets my lazy, vampiric skin needs quite nicely.

It does have a touch of color to the powder, so I don't know if it would blend well with deeper skin tones, or if it's pretty translucent on everyone. (The website says it's translucent.) One bonus for this stuff is that you can buy refills for $16, so you aren't buying the whole damn brush thing every time. Bottom line -- this stuff is a total oldie-face preventative that I need in my life.

That's it. I've spilled every Summer secret I have now. So I guess I'll meet you guys at the crossroads. Or tomorrow-ish. Whatever.


If you need me, I'll be posted up in Alaska, like woah. But keep my sweaty ass company by telling me all about your favorite Summery products in the comments.



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