Showing posts with label Britney Spears. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Britney Spears. Show all posts

Friday, October 12, 2012

An Open Plea to Whoever is Doing Muh Boo, Brit Brit's Makeup.

Let me start by saying this -- I am a ride or die Britney Spears fan. I will cut a b if she talks trash about my boo. So this hurts, but it comes from a good place. I caught Brit on X Factor (don't ask) the other night, and this is what I saw on my 19" TV/VCR combo set.
And this is why I need some contact info on whoever is doing my homegirl's makeup. WHERE ARE YOUR EYEBROWS, MIZZ SPEARS??? I have a suspicion that Britney has been bleaching her brows for the past several years. Because this is what they used to look like.
Hey, there. You look approximately 29384032984 times better with some eyebrows on your damn face, baby. Just lemme pencil them in. Just the tip (of the brow pencil). And please, please take of the choker/thin chain necklaces. We've been trying this look since the dark days of Brit Bootgate in '07.
 Remember those cloven beasts straight from Hell that she wore EVERY DAMN DAY? Okay, okay. I need to calm down. Just let the nice makeup people pencil your eyebrows in. I'm so proud of your ass, though. You're doing great, boo boo.




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Thursday, June 14, 2012

And Everything was Going so Well!

Pic via Marie Claire UK
Just when my girl's looking all hot and ish, we have to go here. Cray shirt, string choker, and sweater uggs. Come on, honey boo boo. Can I PLEASE put your outfits out on the bed for you every morning like our moms did in elementary school? (Not mine. B, please. I wore whatever my crazy ass felt like.)

You guys think I'm joking about Brit Brit's outfits, but look at my goal that I wrote for work:


I ain't playin'.

 
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Thursday, May 24, 2012

Breaking News: Britney Spears Looks Super Hot

Pic via Daily Mail
The worst kept secret in the world is my huge love for Mizzz Britney Spears. I love this b. Crazy, sane, Cheeto-stained fingers, mama no care. This is my homegirl for life. So I'm proud to say that my girl is looking guuuuuuurd thanks to the X Factor. I even have those shoes, but mine aren't YSL, they are, ahem, Baker's. Yep, Baker's.

You know if she was sitting at home she's be in frappuccino spotted sweats and a tank top, sans bra. (P.S. The girl are looking "freshened up," no?) So I'm excited for Brit Brit, even if I don't watch this show. I wish I could do a long ass soak off of those french manicured acrylics, but beggars can't be choosers.

Keep it going, honey boo boo!



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Monday, January 23, 2012

Light a Candle!

 *Seriously, who marries/has kids with this person?

No, this isn't about the flatlining of  Heidi Klum and Seal's marriage, which totally brings the sadness, BTW. This is SERIOUS! Former Mr. Spears level seriousity! (Yep, not a word. Don't google it.) According to TMZ (They also have a couple pics), Kevin Federline was hospitalized in Australia for signs of a heart attack. Seeing that K Fed looks like he's DEEEEP into his third trimester, this ish isn't THAT surprising. But, dang, b is only 33! Honey Boo Boo, you better get this right. Your kids by your three (!!!) babies' mamas need their diiiiddy! (Don't sue me, real Diddy.)


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Friday, December 16, 2011

It's Time for a Big Ol' Britney Spears Wedding, Y'all!

So by now we all know that my little Brit Brit just got engaged to her boyfriend, Jason Trawick. I'm so excited! I feel like Sam Merlotte's twin is a good influence on her, and she seems like she's really getting her sh*t together. In honor of her upcoming nuptials, I have decided to throw a sister a bone and help her start on her wedding planning.

As you know, Britney is a little bit country so I though she might want to sport something that reflects that on her big day. Here are my selections.



Yee haw, right? Well maybe she wants to tone it down a notch, since it is TECHNICALLY her third marriage. So maybe something a little more mature and demure would be more appropriate. No worries, I have that angle covered as well!




I mean the last one even has gloves! Just like when she married K Fed! Speaking of that wedding, maybe Britney wants something a little more like she wore for her reception last time, which was a little more...Like this:


That's miiiightly close to hoo-ha ville. Don't worry, Brit! I have some more 'revealing' dresses picked for you, too.


Too bad this one is already taken. Such understated elegance! Don't worry, I found some other winners.





Surely we have a winner here! One of them even looks like that bedazzled bodysuit homegirl wore back in the day.

I also found a couple more finishing details for Britney's wedding. We know she loves her Starbuck's frapps, so how perfect is this?


Done! How about wedding photos? Brit Brit loves Cheetos, so I found a way to incorporate that.


Perfect! All the hard work is done, y'all! You are welcome, Britney. You are welcome. Pin It

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